My Year of 2017

It’s crazy to think that 2017 is nearly over. In only a few short days it’ll be 2018. My mind can’t wrap itself around that idea. Where did all the time go? I could have sworn it was the 90’s just a few years ago. To think about everything I’ve learned and gone through over the years it mind-blowing.

I am a very organized person and this year alone I’ve gone through so much. And I can honestly say 95% of it was not something I had in mind this time last year. It’s clear my life has not gone as planned this past year.

I really thought I’d have a career and an apartment of my own by now. I’d have a car and a couple of cats of my own. My apartment was going to be beautiful and mismatched, just as my bedroom is now. I’d be saving money and planning on going on that next big trip. I’d go out on the weekends and be more interesting than I am now. My closet would be full, I’d be happy and my dreams would be falling into place.

Idealistic and naive I know.

Each thing I did or went through also taught me. But if there is one thing that I have learned this year is that it’s okay if nothing goes as planned. This is not to say I will not continue to freak out when it doesn’t go as I’d hoped, hey, I’m growing.

Other things I’ve learned or experienced this year is…….

 

  1. Writing a novel takes patience. Before I actually started writing my book I thought it was impossible. I wasn’t good enough; there was no way I could do it. But yet I did. Writer’s block is real and I had to fight it everyday as I was writing nearly 40 hours a week. My goal was 10,000 words a day, and yes, I probably ended up deleting 50,000 words before it was done. My plot changed, my characters grew, I became stronger with the whole process. You can find my book Tetrahedron on Amazon here.
  2. Almost dying is not something that is beautiful and magical, suddenly giving you a new outlook on how precious life is. At least not for me. For me it’s been pain and PTSD. I can hardly sit in a car without panic attacks. My depression and anxiety both became worse after the event. Which was demoralizing in itself as I thought I was getting better. I mean, don’t get me wrong I try not to let it control me. I am re-learning to manage my anxiety and depression. I am fortunate to be alive and I know it. This has been an incredibly difficult lesson to learn this year.
  3. I’d had a plan to visit New York City someday. Well this year it happened! It was an exciting moment and plan for me. I only got to spend 12 hours there, but I have never moved so fast or seen so much in my life. I hope to go back someday soon and see more and actually spend the night there. I’d love to see that amazing city at night. Let me tell you, when New Yorkers brag on their pizza they have every right. Best pizza ever. Also, in my experience people in New York are amazing. I met kind and helpful people. They will call you out on your shit though and I appreciate that.
  4. Skylar Grey is as amazing live in concert as I imagined she would be. I’m obsessed with this singer and I have been dying to see her live. Well, I got to do that this past summer. She sounds the same live as she does on her albums. If you want to read more raving about her I mentioned her in this post.
  5. Blogging has proven to be much more rewarding than I thought it would be. I’ve tried blogging in the past, as I’m sure I’ve mentioned. But it just never stuck. I guess I never knew what I wanted to write about. I just didn’t know how to do it and I wasn’t committed to the idea. After writing my book and publishing it I just felt lost not writing anything. This pushed me to start blogging again and actually figure it out this time. I work very hard on this blog and I’m constantly trying to make it better. Got any tips on what you’d like to see just leave a comment.
  6. A gap year is extremely important. After being unable to even get a single interview, even after sending in resume after resume I decided that I needed to complete a gap year. Yes, I know most gap years are between high school and college. For me I needed a break after college. It sucked me dry and after not being able to get anyone to even call me I felt lost and empty. I didn’t know what I wanted to do and I was beginning to think my life was a waste. This this gap year I found that I am passionate about writing. Will I continue pursuing writing full-time after this gap year? Perhaps. I’m open to the possibilities.
  7. Living with your parents by yourself isn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I was unsure yet hopeful when I wrote this post early in my blog. Well, it’s been a few months and I’m content. Yes, I’d rather have my own place, be making money, and completely independent. But that being said I’m pretty independent in my life right now. Basically living with my parents has just turned into three adults living together, so in other words we’re roommates. And they are less invasive than most roommates. We do our own thing. I wake up every morning and get to work on my writing and blogging. They do the same thing with their respective jobs.

 

My life has been insane and I’m trying to learn to love it. Some days are definitely better than others, but such is life.

How are your year gone? I’d love to hear about it.

4 Comments on “My Year of 2017

  1. We have to be gentle with ourselves. It looks like you accomplished a lot and should be proud. Life is a journey and there are twists in the road we never anticipated. It is how we handle those twists and I think you are doing okay. To 2018 we can handle it.

    Like

  2. Loved reading this! You are so strong to have gone through whatever you did! I hope the new year brings you nothing but happiness! ♥️♥️

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: