The summer was just ending and Alicia was beginning to feel it. Every year for as long as she could remember she has felt sad as the chilly, autumn winds blew in. But, this year is different. Alicia doesn’t feel sad or depressed she feels encouraged. Sure she has no idea what she’s doing or what she’s going to do but she feels positive that it will end up perfectly fine.
“You seem happy, Alicia” Katherine, her best friend, says.
Her friend’s voice shakes her out of her thoughts. “I’m sorry what?”
“I said, you seem happy. You never are happy this time of year. Always talk about how the fall means death. Blah. Blah. Blah. I haven’t heard a word from you. What’s up?”
Alicia is surprised by Katherine’s observation. In fact, before right now Alicia hadn’t even realized there was any difference. Something about how she feels is natural. She know’s her friend is waiting for her to respond so she thinks about why this difference is even there.
“Katherine, I have no idea why I am happier than usual.” Alicia admits after being silent for a long minute. “I just feel hopeful. Usually, as you know, I feel like I have no control over my life or the outcomes. But I don’t feel that way anymore, not right now at least. Something about graduating from school has opened my eyes. I don’t have to be like everyone else. All through school I fought myself. Trying to be who I thought everyone wanted, who I thought I wanted. I never gave myself time to just do my own thing. I was always going to class or doing homework. I never had time to stretch my wings and fly. This period in my life is the time for self-discovery. I can feel it. Who am I really? What do I want in this life?”
Katherine has no idea what to say. She thinks perhaps Alicia has totally lost it. Isn’t everyone just supposed to slip into their box and live the ‘dream’? She is worried for her friend, but looking at that face…….it’s so hopeful. She can’t say anything. She isn’t that mean.
Alicia can read Katherine’s face and it hurts a little. Her own best friend doesn’t believe in her. She opens her mouth to argue, but then quickly shuts it. It’s not worth it, her friend may not believe in her, but she believes in herself. As difficult as it is not having the support of the one closest to her, this is just something she has to do. She gets the sudden realization that this journey of finding herself might get a little lonely. People might think she’s crazy. But hell, it will be worth it in the end.
Alicia hugs her best friend. This is her journey, not Katherine’s.
Note: Each month I will be publishing a short story that I have written. The topics and plots may vary. I hope you enjoy and come back for next months story.